Post Mother's Day thoughts

I've had some thoughts on Mother's Day that have been jumping around in my head for the past couple days. These thoughts have gone from my head to my fingertips several times, but I haven't had the courage emotional energy to put them into my computer. This is for my own journaling purposes and not for clever entertainment, like I think I sometimes do. So >taking a deep breath< here goes. Mother's Day was a bit of an emotional rollercoaster for me for several reasons. Here are some of those reasons in no particular order: All three of our block meetings were spiritually uplifting. There were moments in each of the meetings that the Spirit was nearly tangible for me. Speaking on mothers gave me pause to reflect on the mother I was/am to my children. I gave birth to three amazing children, one of whom chooses not to speak to me. It makes my heart hurt, I miss him that much. I'm married to a man who treats me like a queen, not just on Mother's Day, but every day. When I'd hear women say "I'm married to my best friend", I use think "Nuh uh, that is so hokey". Well it turns out that you can actually be married to your best friend and I am. This best friend came with five (grown) children of his own. They are without their mother, and I know what that feels like. My own mom died when I was 21 and had, just three weeks before her passing, had my first baby. I wanted my kids to know their grandma...how kind and smart and funny she was. I wanted to know her woman to woman, not just child to parent. I've been sad, but not bitter or angry that she was taken from me this earth life at such a young age, because I know that Heavenly Father's plan is what I signed up for in the pre-existence. My dad never remarried after her passing. In hind sight, I wonder if I was encouraging him enough to date again, or if I was comfortable with him being alone. So Ron and I have 8 kids and 16, nearly 18 grand children. His... mine... the lines have blurred with our grandchildren as to their lineage. We just know that we love them all. Our children, while neither one of us can take "credit"(??) for raising all eight of them, were born Erin, Amy, Shannon, Jon, Sean, Janae, Daniel and Christopher, and that mix gives both he and I the ability to relate to all of them as if they were our own respectively. I find that the "mother bear" comes out in me as easily for Ron's kids as my own. I would like to think that when I meet Ron's first Kathy I'll be able to say " I loved your kids and was there for them as if they were my own. Did I do OK?"